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Fengming Mountain.
Yu Tuan’er has been away for two days. Based on the horse’s distance, he should have arrived at Haoyun Mountain. In Jihe Villa, the man silently walked into the hall carrying two bowls of white fungus porridge and placed them on the table.
Liu Yan was the only one in the room. Ever since he woke up after being stabbed in the brain, he had been lying on the bed silently, as if he was dead. Fang Pingzhai was playing drums in the valley. The sound of the drums was faintly audible, but it became more and more extraordinary. The majestic drums could actually produce sounds of sorrow and resentment, sometimes like thunder and lightning, sometimes like birds chirping in the spring breeze. Little does that person know that if she hadn’t learned martial arts, Liu Yan would have lost all his martial arts. Such a powerful drum sound would be enough to make a second- or third-rate figure in the world boil with blood and die.
With a “click”, the man put the white fungus porridge on the table. After Yu Tuan’er left, Liu Yan became more and more lifeless. Sometimes he didn’t move for a day and a night, but she knew that he was not unconscious. Just very empty.
The antidote to the Oranguki Jiuxin Pill has been made, where will he go after being made of great evil? No one told him what to do next, and it was difficult for him to make a decision on his own. She walked up to him, Liu Yan moved her lips slightly, “Get out.” He didn’t even open his eyes.
She took two steps outside. He thought she was about to go out, but she stopped and whispered, “You…are you going to die on hunger strike?” He opened his eyes, he didn’t know , he just remained silent because he didn’t know what to do. But…a hunger strike? He never thought about dying, but maybe… before he even realized it, his body had already done so consciously.
“Don’t be like this. If you die, I don’t know how sad this girl will be. Maybe you will kill another innocent girl.” Her voice was soft, but not tactful. She even said it a little harshly, because her words The content was so straightforward that it penetrated directly into his heart. “I don’t think you are willing to kill anyone anymore.”
“If she dies, she will die. No matter who it is, she will die in the end.” Liu Yan said coldly, “You will die too, and I will die too.”
She took a deep breath, “Even if… you don’t care about my sister, don’t you care about Mr. Tang’s life or death? He… he’s going to die, isn’t he?” When she said this, she couldn’t help but tremble all over. , In fact, deep down in my heart, I never believed that Tang Lici would die. I couldn’t believe it no matter what. He was so omnipotent and a monster that manipulated people’s hearts. How could he die?
“He always has a way…” Liu Yan’s lips twitched slightly, and her voice suddenly became weak, “There is always a way… to save yourself…” She turned around and whispered, ” To this day, you still believe that he is omnipotent.” Liu Yan did not answer. After a while, he said quietly, “Who doesn’t believe it? He…he is always omnipotent…but…” She He continued and whispered, “But it is impossible for someone to be omnipotent forever. You are afraid that he will not be able to do it one time. The scary thing is… I don’t know which time it is…”
Liu Yan opened her eyes in surprise and looked at her with an almost burning gaze. How could she speak so thoroughly? It’s like grabbing each word from your own heart and putting it in front of your eyes. Could it be that what they are thinking in each other’s hearts is exactly the same? That person squatted down and held his hand. Her palm was very warm. “I care about him and my sister. How could you die? If you die, my sister will be heartbroken to death. What kind of blow will he receive? Maybe You and I can’t even imagine…” Her eyes were slightly moist, “I don’t want you to die either, although…” Her hand relaxed slightly, and he felt that her fingers were cold, and he heard her continue, “Although… …Although…”
Although she tried to say something, she couldn’t. He didn’t know whether she wanted to say “Although I hate you very much”, or “Although you have done such cruel things to me”, or “Although you are useless”… But no matter what she said, it was better than being silent. At least, it won’t fill him with self-loathing. “I…” Liu Yan slowly sat up from the bed, “I’m not going to die on hunger strike, but… I’m just thinking…” He whispered, “Would everyone be much happier if I never existed? What’s the point of living?” He looked at that person, “I just think so.”
His nature is really a very gentle person… Her hand became warm again and she held his hand again. “You will give me courage if you live.” Willow eyes trembled slightly and opened wide. She looked into his eyes with those extremely beautiful eyes, “Have you…never thought…that you are a very courageous person?”
“Courage?” Liu Yan looked at her with an almost dull gaze, as if he didn’t know what she was talking about.
She smiled, and she smiled very gently, “You have done a lot of things wrong and hurt a lot of people, and others have hurt you a lot and made you lose a lot of things. But even if it becomes like this, you have neither “You resent others, you don’t resent reality, you don’t resent yourself…” She said softly, “You are just regretting, not resentful. You can still care about others and miss others. If you are not very courageous, who can Can you afford it? ”
He blinked his eyes slowly, from being a powerful man in the world to being on the run, from controlling the fate of millions of people to being worthless, from being a rare handsome man in the world to being a **** with disfigured face and broken legs, Maybe it’s really hard for others to get through.
But none of the things he once owned were what he really wanted, so he wouldn’t be too sad even if he lost them… It’s just that, is that considered courage?
If those are not what you want, then what do you want?
Losing something will cause heartache, something that will make you resent others and yourself unforgettable, something that will cause you to fall deeply into yourself and be unable to extricate yourself… What is it?
He looked at that person in a daze. At this moment, he unexpectedly realized that… the thing he cared about most, the thing that would break his heart if he lost it, turned out to be… the shadow of his former self. ……
The gentle and attentive man lives only for simple purposes and does not have to think about any deep and complex issues. I once deeply hated myself for being such a useless person, and tried every means to surpass Tang Lici and completely change myself, but in the end…it turned out that what I lost was the most cherished…simple Own.
If he could do it all over again, if he could still become that Ayan, he would not hesitate to…any price or effort. But after making a big mistake, is he still qualified to go back to his past?
“Willow Eyes?”
He pursed his lips, “I… am not very courageous, I am just… ignorant and confused.”
That smile is very warm, “I think you are very courageous, and as long as you stand there now, I will feel that you look very warm. Even if you are in such a state of desolation, you will still do things seriously and care.” Sister, care about Mr. Tang, care about me.” She shook her head, “You are more reassuring than Mr. Tang.”
He looked at her in surprise, and there seemed to be a crisp sound in his heart. Something heavy and rusty broke. For a moment, his heart felt like it was in a cloud, “You mean… I also have… something better than him.” ?” he asked softly, his voice weak.
“Of course.” She held his hands and blurted out, “Mr. Tang… is not good at all, completely…” After finishing speaking, she was immediately shocked and closed her mouth. Liu Yan sighed softly, and caressed the sides of her fingers with his fingers, feeling the woman’s delicacy, and then slowly took it back, “Why can’t you love him? Why do you have to resist?”
“Young Master Tang…although he cares about me very much, the one he cares about, loves and tortures is not that person, but someone else in his imagination.” She whispered, never thinking that these words would affect anyone But in front of Liu Yan, for some reason, he said it naturally. “He wants someone to love him like crazy and die for him, but I…” she whispered, “no matter how similar I am to the person he wants, I can’t go crazy for him or die for him.” Let him die.”
She shook her head, looking gloomy. He inserted his five fingers into the long hair in front of his forehead and kept his forehead motionless. She would not die for anyone, let alone for a man who did not truly love her, let alone a man who was truly loved by other women. “What he wants… is that his mother can love him to the point of going crazy and die for him.” He sighed faintly, “His mother is a famous beauty who looks exactly like him. She is that A very dignified and elegant woman.”
This is the mother who heard about Tang Lici for the first time. Her heart skipped a beat and she felt inexplicably nervous. “She…she doesn’t love her child?” Liu Yan looked at her fingers, “No. Love. From A Li… I mean Tang Li Ci, from the time he was born until he grew up, she almost never lived with him, and never visited other people’s houses to celebrate the New Year, and the whole family ate together. Dinner at Ali’s house…” He paused slightly, “His father and mother will spend the night together, and his father will lock him up in a room far away.”
She looked at Liu Yan in surprise, “Lock it up? Why lock it up?” She simply couldn’t imagine that as a parent, she would lock up her child. What if one day she locked Fengfeng in a room far away from her? Here, she must have gone crazy.
“Because they are afraid of him.” He said very calmly, because he himself has never spent the New Year with his parents. “They think he is a monster. Every time they see him, they have to bring many people with him to protect him anytime and anywhere. They, especially his mother, sometimes have phobias when she sees him…” He paused and explained, “It’s a state of being so frightened that he has difficulty breathing and almost goes crazy.”
“How could… be like this?” The man bit his lip, “Why are they afraid of him? What is there to be afraid of, his own child? Mr. Tang is gentle and gentle, not a savage beast…” Halfway through her words, her expression changed. I became more and more depressed and could no longer speak. Yes, Tang Lici is both intelligent and gentle, not a savage beast, but she is deeply afraid of him, and sometimes she is as afraid as if she has seen something… a monster…
“Ha…” Liu Yan laughed, “Because they believe that Ah Li is a born monster and will turn into a murderer sooner or later. They regret giving birth to him. No matter how good or bad Ah Li did , they don’t care, they just keep giving money,” he said slowly, “The only thing they do is spend endless money on their children and let them squander it endlessly…”
Sure enough… Looking at Mr. Tang’s luxurious habits, we know that he did not become like this suddenly, but has been living like this for a long time, so even if he spends money like water, there is no sense of disharmony at all. The man bit his lip deeply, unable to describe his feelings, “Are his mother and I… alike?”
Liu Yan raised his eyes and looked at her, “It’s not like that, but…” He took a deep breath and said in a tired tone, “But you are a good mother. Maybe he hopes in his heart that his mother will be like you. He said he liked you, and that was not a lie.”
She smiled softly, “He just looks forward to being loved by his mother, but resents his mother for not loving him. Why… why do I have to bear all this? I… I am not his mother. You No matter whether it’s Wanyu Yuedan or myself, he wants me to be patient and love him. Just because of that reason, he can treat me well or torture me as a matter of course. I… I have to Opening up everything, abandoning dignity, allowing to be plundered and trampled…” Her breathing quickened, “Then after he vented his resentment towards his mother and satisfied his demands for her, he heard a few apologies and received a large sum of money. Qiancai left – I – I am not willing to do this! I am not his mother, you want me to love him, how should I… love him? In my heart, he is not a child. She looked at Liu Yan sadly, full of sadness, “I am just a woman, not a saint. When a woman falls in love with a man, she will expect good results and will look forward to a lifetime. I can’t clearly see them parting ways. Ending, but still able to love him.”
“The more you resist, the more he wants to conquer you, and he will use all kinds of methods, and the more he will torture you.” Liu Yan whispered, “He will think it is a game, and all games He has to win. If you let him lose, he will either go crazy, collapse, or kill you.”
The man closed his eyes, “I don’t want to lose, and I don’t want to force him…”
“That is already…impossible, he believes you.” Liu Yan said slowly, “I’m sorry, I still hope you can love him and make his life easier.”
“Saying such words proves that you have passed away from me.” She whispered, “Live well, be nice to the girl, and don’t let her down. I know everyone hopes that Mr. Tang can live a better life. I will… try my best to convince myself.” After a slight pause, she smiled gently, “Can you eat porridge now? If you let the girl know that you don’t eat or drink, I will scold you.”
He was so moved… He looked at her smile, she smiled tolerantly and calmly, and his heart was filled with pain – even though he knew that compared to Tang Lici, she was just an insignificant woman, so everyone would rather sacrifice her. Everything went to fulfill Tang Lici’s momentary happiness, but she would still say “I will try my best to convince myself” and still smile.
Such a woman…is really courageous and strong, right? He looked at her intently, why couldn’t he let go and **** this woman? She was right not to fall in love with Ali, even though she was deeply attracted to him. If he takes her away and treats her gently, he might be able to change his mind one day. But…but compared to that intention, what he couldn’t ignore even more was Ah Li…
What would happen to him if he snatched that one away?
Liu Yan held his head, he couldn’t imagine what would happen to A Li…
There will definitely be some hysterical, crazy and fatal things happening…